Our (modest) proposal for a Man From U.N.C.L.E. movie

The recent news that yet another possible movie version of The Man From U.N.C.L.E. has surfaced has gotten the attention of fans.

There has always been a segment of the fan base that has felt nobody other than Robert Vaughn and David McCallum should ever play Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin. The actors are now 77 and 76 years old respectively. That means they’re even older than Leo G. Carroll, who played U.N.C.L.E. bossman Alexander Waverly, was when the series ended its run in January 1968.

On the other hand, another segment of the fan base doesn’t really want to follow the adventures of new U.N.C.L.E. agents. They want Solo and Kuryakin and are willing to sample the work of new actors as long as it’s entertaining and they don’t do something wildly out of character.

That’s a wide gap to try to bridge. But we think we’ve done it. Here’s our modest proposal:

CONCEPT: The men from U.N.C.L.E. are back! We witness the tension and excitement as Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin carry out their duties as the co-chief executives of U.N.C.L.E.! Meetings! Budget reports! Executive appointments! Mission assignments!

Sample scene:

SOLO and ILLYA are in their office, sitting at a conference table they share.

SOLO
That brings us to the vacancy for head of the lab section. I think Larry should get the job.

ILLYA
I disagree. Dimitri is far more qualified.

SOLO
I think you’re underestimating Larry.

ILLYA
Perhaps. But I am unswayed by your point.

SOLO (a pause)
You won’t change your mind?

ILLYA
Would you if you were in my position?

SOLO
I suppose not. There’s only one way to settle this.

SOLO and ILLYA each form a fist with their right hand. They position their open left hand underneath. Each man’s fist comes down on the open left hand, once, then again and finally a third time. Then, SOLO extends the INDEX and MIDDLE FINGER. ILLYA’S RIGHT HAND comes up flat.

SOLO (wryly)
Scissors cuts paper. Next item…

WARNING: Do not take this post seriously.

UPDATE: We corrected the end date of the original series to January 1968.